Just because you are single doesn’t mean you can’t still have a sexy solo Valentine’s day to remember. Not sure how? Shannon Burton is here to help you plan the perfect solos Valentine’s date with yourself
Valentine’s Day can be tough for those of us riding solo, but it doesn’t have to be. Sometimes, dedicating an entire day to self-love (both emotionally and, ahem, physically) is an even better experience than spending the day partnered up!
The secret to a sexy solo Valentine’s Day is simple: love yourself the way you want to be loved. Give yourself the gift of whatever the ideal partner would give you; be your own best lover.
Unsure of where to start? Here are some tips.
Prepare in advance
If there’s still time left before the big day, gather everything you’ll need to make it special.
If you enjoy a raunchy romance novel, shop around for one to enjoy on V-day. For those who prefer videos or movies, consider paying for access to something new or special to spend the day watching.
Maybe there’s a toy that’s been on your wish-list for a while that you can splurge on. This is the perfect time to invest in you and your satisfaction. Make sure to order with plenty of time to ship if ordering online—that way, you have exactly what you need, when you need it.
Take the pressure off
Trying too hard often makes it impossible to have a good time. Valentine’s Day is no exception.
Spend part of the day doing things that de-stress you, whether that means going for a walk, binging a favorite show, or calling other solo friends you love talking to. These activities should help you unwind and get to a place where you can truly enjoy yourself.
As mentioned, a little preparation here can go a long way. If you need to book a spa treatment (maybe a suggestion for a post Covid world) or place an order for your favorite meal to be delivered so you don’t have to cook, you’ll want to do that in advance. Otherwise, you risk the day already being blocked out.
If it’s too close to the date and you’ve missed all your faves, don’t fret. There’s still plenty you can do to have the sexiest solo Valentine’s Day ever. Sometimes, preparation is as simple as making sure you have a fresh set of sheets and a good playlist for the day.
Set the mood
When you’re ready to sink into a sexy self-lovin’ experience, take time to create your ideal sensual environment.
Consider your senses. What music makes you feel sexy? What about scents, fabrics against your skin, decadent treats you can slow down and savor?
Dim the lights, and if you feel like it, light some candles. Consider using the voice-activated shutter on your smartphone to stage a boudoir photo shoot in your most enticing outfit-or nothing at all. These can be kept for yourself, or shared with appreciative and consenting friends.
Set up a sexy play-date with yourself, and you might be surprised to discover just how much fun can be had flying solo on V-day.
Include sexy friends
Just because you’re solo, doesn’t mean you have to be alone—even if social distancing is necessary. Have a few friends who enjoy the occasional nude? Are you in any online groups or message threads where conversation can get a little kinky? Reach out to others who are spending this day alone and see if they’d like to join you in some sexy, flirty fun.
One or more of those friends may be open to kicking things up a notch, whether that means swapping fantasies, getting on a video chat to play, or even meeting in person (if it’s safe to). Even if that’s not the case, talking to sexy friends can certainly help amp things up for your solo play session—give it a try!
Even without sexy friends, of course, it’s still possible to enjoy a truly solo day. If you’re struggling to believe it, try writing a journal about your sexiest assets and times where you felt like you were your best sexual self. Sometimes, we just have to channel our inner sex champion to remember that we’ve got everything we need to be sexy right here with us.
A Sexy Valentine’s Day Isn’t Just For Partnered People
We should all know how to best love ourselves, both in and out of the bedroom. Spend this Valentine’s Day doing a mix of old favorite activities as well as something a little new, and you’re sure to have a sexy Valentine’s Day that you’ll be trying hard to top next year.
Shannon (they/she) is a sex coach and content writer residing in New Orleans.