Kissing – The Erotic Super Power We All Have

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I love kissing, slow ones, wet ones, ones that work slowly down the neck, the ones where you suck lightly on a lip.

Kissing is my thing and it’s such an underrated activity considering how incredibly erotic it is!

When did you last really kiss?

So you’re in a relationship and if asked ‘do you kiss each other?’ You’re likely to say ‘sure we kiss each other’, maybe it’s a peck on the cheek or a kiss on the lips when you come in our go out to work. But when was the last time you looked straight into your partner’s eyes, run your finger through their hair to the back of their neck before slowly leaning in for a soft, slightly open mouthed kiss, followed by one on the cheek and one on their neck?

Think of kissing as foreplay, a kiss in the morning that turns your partner on while also lingers in their head all day, a pleasant distraction they keep thinking about. And a simple text ‘I can’t wait to kiss you again’ instantly bringing back those memories and feelings all at once.

If we all kissed more we would all be that little bit happier.

So how do we kiss better? Well it’s not really a matter of being better as we all have the ability to kiss. It’s more a matter of being aware of your actions and what they can do while acknowledging your partner reactions and building on what they like at that exact moment.


Before we go on we’re going to assume people reading this are in a form of relationship that has consent. However, if you’re not and your about to kiss someone for the first time make sure your reading the signs correctly. If in doubt ask, lean in for a kiss then stop to ask the question ‘can I kiss you’. When done correctly its a great way to build sexual tension if they do want to kiss you but also prevents you miss judging the signs if not also we recommend that everyone reads the post on blog by Amy Norton called Consent is sexy (and necessary)    

What makes a good kiss?

A good kiss, just like a good fuck is very much in the eye of the beholder. However, you can break a kiss down into several different moments or actions, the combination of moments and actions that make the perfect kiss for a particular person can be different.

Seductively slow kissing

Being seductively slow is ridiculously effective! Looking right into their eyes and holding that gaze for a moment while slightly licking or biting your lip just before you slowly go in for a kiss.

Be confident, in control and slow.

You will be amazed at just how much sexual tension can build up in those brief moments. Their mind will be running wild and that first touch of your soft lips on there’s will send hearts beating into over-drive.

Soft and relaxed

Make sure your first kisses are soft, relaxed, sensual and slow allowing each kiss to rest lightly on their lips, for the warmth of your body to be noticeably close before pulling slightly away to go in with an equally soft, sensual kiss.  

Don’t force your lips together, hard lips just don’t evoke the same sexual playfulness as soft. If your nervous you might be tempted to rush, Don’t. Be seductively slow and intentional then laugh about your nerves afterwards.

Hands on

Use your hands but use them wisely. Taking one hand sliding a finger across their cheek, sliding your fingers in to their hair, lightly holding the side and back of their neck as you kiss them.

Hands are something that can feel awkward when you use them but also when you don’t use them. The trick is one slow hand at a time and to be firm yet soft, a soft gentle moment such as gliding the back of your hand across their face in to a firm action of holding the back of their neck.

How firm is subjective, some people will like to be held firmer than others while the setting or the mood can change how firmly they like to be held.

Head, lips, face, neck, chest, back, arms and bum are all places your hands can caress.  


Using your tongue is a really intimate way of kissing, gently slinging your tongue out to touch their lips, licking lightly, then again to meet their tongue to a rhythm you both share.

Use your tongue lightly and intentionally, it’s a real erotic part of your body that can send tingles down the spine and make people week at the knees. 

However, using your tongue can also go badly, to make sure you avoid an uncomfortable situation there are some things to keep in mind.

Make sure you don’t only use your tongue, you’re not a reptile and its often not sexy. Don’t dive your tongue unexpectedly in to someone’s mouth, light licks on their lips and allowing their tongue to meet yours give everyone the opportunity to enjoy the kiss.   

Kissing is more than lips

Kiss more than their lips, kiss down the side of their cheek to the neck, mixing up it with little kisses and licks. Take your kiss to the ear and run your tongue lightly over their ear lobe, kiss the inside of their wrist, kiss the top of the chest by the collar bone. There are so many different places you can kiss that breaks up the kissing without losing the tension and sensations built up.

Don’t focus on one thing for too long and pay attention to your partner and how they react. When you kiss the right spot they like don’t overdo it but come back every now and then.

Break away for eye contact

Take a moment to stop, pull away and look in to their eyes allowing the moment to hang before going be in for another seductively slow kiss.

Breaking the kiss to gaze at your partner can really take your kissing to a different level and turn up the heat. To keep that connection try keeping a hand on the back of their neck or caressing their cheek, even pulling up their hands to kiss them while looking at your partner.


Light bites on the lower lips in between kisses or gentle bites down the neck can drive your partner wild, but remember to be light.

You’re not trying to draw blood or cause pain. Doing so is likely going to end the wonderful kissing experience you have both created.

There’s a time and place for biting harder and that’s best discussed with your partner beforehand.   

Bring it close

A great kiss can be made just that bit better by being closer to your partner. Step in closer or carefully pull them closer to you, allow your chest, hips and legs to touch.  

The perfect kiss

You now have the knowledge to have the perfect kiss but the problem is there’s no such thing as the perfect kiss. There is however a kiss that is memorable, a kiss that makes your partner melt, go weak at the knees and that could well be their perfect kiss.

Kissing is hot, its sexy and very underrated so spend a little more time kissing and watch your relationship blossom in to something more. 

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