For most people born with a womb periods are a regular part of their adult lives. It is something that will turn up most months from their early to mid teens right up until their late 40’s/early 50’s. Sure contraception, pregnancy and other factors can there might be breaks in that cycle but for the most part it will be a regular feature of life with a womb and therefore so is the subject of period sex.
There has been a long history of stigma and taboo around the subject of period sex with their being lots of myths around hygiene and health as well as a general stigma that surrounds the subjects of periods themselves that has resulted in many people abstaining from sex during their periods and therefore missing out on what can be an amazingly sexy and intimate time to have sex with your partner.
The starting point as for so many things when it comes to bodies and relationships is to talk to your partner about period sex. Clearly it not something you just want to spring on someone but also bodies can be unpredictable and the chances of your period never turning up unannounced during sex at some point during your relationship is fairly low so even if it is not something you would choose or want to do it is still a subject to have a conversation around so that when those moments happens everyone knows what the other person is comfortable with.
However if you are up for period sex and your partner is too then you also want to talk through what things you would be comfortable with the what you would not. For example you might be OK with penetration but not OK with receiving oral sex or your partner might not be OK with giving oral sex. So having a really honest conversation about that stuff means when the times comes everyone is on the same page.
Oh and never shame anyone for their boundaries. If someone is not into something that is absolutely OK as long as they don’t say that in a way that shames you for having periods.
Remember that sex does not have to be penis in vagina and so if that is something you wouldn’t want to do that doesn’t mean that all sex is off the table. If you are wearing a tampon then maybe your partner could perform oral sex on your clit, maybe it is a time when you would be open to having anal sex or a great time to explore some mutual masturbation. There are so many sexy things you can do together that are not penis in vagina so even if that is not your thing during your period you can still enjoy getting it on with your partner whilst you are on.
For many people who menstruate orgasms can help to relieve and even get rid of period pains however for some people they can also intensify them and make them worse. Clearly if you are the latter then it is probably best to avoid orgasms but if not then the more orgasms the better which means period sex might be something for you to try and if not, then definitely enjoy masturbating during your periods. Also orgasms which basically cause internal contractions can actually increase your flow and there is evidence that people who orgasm regularly during their period have short cycles because the orgasm increases their menstrual flow meaning things are over quicker.
So every one is up for a bit of period sex. Hurrah! You can of course be spontaneous and just go for it but at the very least you might want to have a towel nearby that you can either lay down beneath you or at the very least reach for afterwards so that you don’t have to end up changing your bed sheets. You also might want to think about investing a some water proof sheets that you can put down. They are brilliant for was x play too so definitely worth getting. The other thing you might want to consider is using the time of the month to indulge in some shower sex. The perfect hot and steamy atmosphere for you to explore each others bodies in and lots of running water to help wash things away.
There are lots of myths surrounding period sex and being able to get pregnant but one of the most common ones is that you can’t actually get pregnant while you are on your period. That is not actually true. Whilst the chances are greatly diminished they are not completely removed and so don’t discard your contraception just because Aunt Flow is in town.
On the amazing things about period sex is all the extra slip and slide juices it involves and the fact that the added blood flow to the whole area can actually make you more sensitive than usually leading to really intense orgasms. It can also be a great time of the month to get playing with sex toys especially those which are water proof and/or made of material like silicone which mean that there is no chance of the blood staining your toys and will just wash off with hot soapy water.
However period sex is also not for everyone. For some people it is a time in their cycle when they don’t feel remotely sexy and if that is you or you just don’t fancy the idea of period sex it is absolutely OK to set that as your boundary. Periods are a normal healthy part of having a womb and whether you want to get it on whilst you are on is totally up to the individual to determine. There is no right answer when it comes to; Would you like to have period sex? Apart from the one that makes you happy.
Molly Moore – Author, Blogger, Photographer, Speaker, Director of Operations @Eroticon Find me in my corner of the internet at Molly’s Daily Kiss and on Twitter @mollysdailykiss
