Once you’ve mastered the basics of strap-on sex, there are all kinds of ways you can enhance your experience and take your play to the next level. Regardless of your gender, genitals, or relationship configuration, there are more ways to have strap-on sex than you think!
Here are six hot and sexy ideas to help you expand your horizons and get adventurous. As always, take the ones that work for you and leave the rest.
Try different positions
With any kind of sex, including strap-on sex, it can be easy to fall into a rut and keep doing the same positions again and again. There’s nothing wrong with finding something you like and sticking to it, but why not change up your positions once in a while?
If the receptive partner is usually on their back, try doggy style. If the person wearing the strap-on is usually on top, try the cowgirl/cowboy position. You can get books of positions or look online for inspiration, or you can just experiment and see what feels best for you both.
Try a strapless strap-on
A strapless strap-on is worn inside the vagina of the person wielding the toy, who then uses the longer end to penetrate their partner. A strapless strap-on provides additional physical pleasure for the giver as well as the receiver, and it can be a super hot way to reach simultaneous climax if that’s something you’re into.
Using a strapless strap-on is a learning curve and you’ll need to experiment to see which positions work best. Getting it to stay in place takes practice, but it’s worth it when you master the technique and can definitely take your strap on game to not only the next level but a whole new level.
Add a vibrator
If the receiving partner is into internal vibrations, you can get vibrating strap-on toys that feel amazing. But there are other ways to add a vibrator to your strap-on sex, too.
Some harnesses feature a pocket for a bullet vibrator. This adds extra pleasure for the person wearing the strap-on while they penetrate their partner. The receptive person can also use a vibrating toy to stimulate their penis or clitoris while their partner penetrates them, which can make it easier to reach orgasm or make the orgasm more intense.
Change up who is wearing the cock
If the same person usually wears the strap-on and does the penetrating, why not mix it up? Not everyone is into taking on both roles but, if you’re curious, you might be surprised to find how much you like being on the other end of the strap-on.
By the way: wearing a strap-on isn’t just for people with vulvas. You can have a lot of fun with it even if you’ve got a factory-installed penis. So why not switch things up and if you normally get penetrated, try penetrating your partner, and vice versa?
Try a strap-on blowjob
Strap-on sex is usually associated with penetrating your partner vaginally or anally. But have you ever tried a strap-on blowjob? Wearing your harness and having your partner suck, lick, and gently nibble on your silicone cock can be super hot.
You might be wondering what the person wearing the harness gets out of this since they can’t feel the sensations. Whether you like playing with power or just find the visual of your partner going down on you sexy, this is a different way to enjoy and play with that dynamic.
Try roleplay
Strap-on sex does not inherently have a power dynamic attached. But it does open up all kinds of possibilities for roleplay scenarios. Whether you’re interested in being a naughty student getting spanked by your teacher and then bent over their desk, or you want to be an obedient sexual slave who penetrates your partner for their pleasure, you can incorporate roleplay fantasies into your next level strap-on play.
Remember: the person wearing the harness isn’t necessarily the dominant party. You get to choose!
Just have fun with it and be willing to laugh at yourselves. Sex is best when it comes with a dose of humour.
Whatever You Do, Communicate
The only right way to have strap-on sex is the way that is safe and feels right to you and your partner. If any of these ideas appeal, use them! If you have your own, that’s great, too.
Whatever you choose to do and however you like to play, make sure you communicate and check in at every stage. This will ensure you’re both on the same page and keep things consensual, connected, and hot as hell as you explore the next level of strap-on sex.
Amy Norton (she/they) is a sex writer, blogger, and pleasure product afficionado who has been running her site, Coffee & Kink, since 2016. She is a polyamorous, queer femme and lives in the UK with her nesting partner, cat, and frankly ridiculous collection of vibrators.