2022 is finally here and if you’re anything like me, you are probably glad to see the back of 2021. From getting fit to learning a new skill, this is the time of year when many people are making resolutions and plans to improve their lives. If this sounds like you, then why not also include a sexy bucket list for 2022.
Here are seven fun and sexy resolutions you might want to put on your sexy bucket list!
Bring a Fantasy to Life
Do you fantasise about having a threesome, getting tied up, or roleplaying? 2022 is the year to bring those dreams to life.
If your fantasies involve other people, remember to take their needs into account as much as your own. Talk to your partner(s) about what you’d like to try and if they say no, respect that. Communicate and check in regularly as you go to make sure everyone is still having a good time.
Consume Some New Erotic Media
Do you gravitate to the same old favourites again and again? If so, it’s time to discover some new erotic media to enjoy. Try a new genre of porn, read some erotica by an author you’ve never read before, or try audio porn. You might be surprised at what you learn about your sexuality!
I strongly advocate paying for your porn. This means that you’ll be supporting the people creating the content you love (so they can keep making more of it!) Ethically produced porn means that performers are treated well, paid fairly, and in control of what they will and will not do.
Buy a New Toy
Switch up your sex or masturbation routine by treating yourself to a new toy. A new vibrator, dildo, masturbator, or butt plug can help you to experience new sensations and enjoy your body in all kinds of new ways.
Looking for something unusual? For people with a clitoris, I cannot recommend the Godemiche Grind Ring enough! This innovative invention was an absolute game-changer for me. (Pro tip: the Waves texture is my favourite.)
Invest in Good Lube
If there’s a single thing I recommend to almost everyone when it comes to sex, it’s to use lube. Proper lubrication reduces friction, helps to eliminate pain during sex, and makes every sensation more pleasurable. If you’re using barriers such as condoms, lube can also reduce the risk of your barriers tearing.
I recommend a good water-based lube. Water-based lube is compatible with all toy types (unlike silicone-based), won’t degrade barrier materials such as latex (unlike oil-based), and is gentle on your body and easy to clean up. Look for natural and simple ingredients and avoid products containing parabens and glycerin. H20 by Sliquid or Wylde One by Into the Wylde are my faves.
Wear Something That Makes You Feel Fabulous
Some gorgeous lingerie, a sexy strap-on, skintight jeans, or perhaps nothing at all? Whatever type of look makes you feel sexy, take the time to indulge that this year. Whether you’re enjoying a night in with your partner, a night out at a sexy party, or just taking some pictures for your own fun and gratification, you deserve to look and feel amazing.
Throw out the societal rulebook about which genders or body types should wear what items, and think about what feels right to you.
Attend a Workshop
No matter how long you’ve been having sex, there’s always something new to learn. Make this the year you attend a sexy workshop to brush up on your skills. Classes are available on everything from rope bondage to roleplay and fellatio to fisting. You might find classes at your local sex club, BDSM dungeon, or feminist sex toy store.
Live far from a major city or still staying at home because of the pandemic? Many educators are now running classes online, so you can learn from the comfort of your living room.
Both physical and virtual events are often listed on Fetlife.
In the years I’ve been writing about sex, I’ve learned that huge numbers of people think they are sexually “broken” or that there’s something wrong with them. From people with vulvas who don’t orgasm from penetration to people with penises who struggle to get and stay hard, countless people are living with massive and unnecessary sexual shame.
Here’s what I’d like you to internalise this year: you are normal!
However you experience sex, pleasure, arousal, and orgasm (or even if you don’t experience any of these things at all), your sexuality is perfect and beautiful just as it is. Make this the year you stop apologising, stop thinking there’s something wrong with you, and start accepting your unique and wonderful self.
What’s on your sexy bucket list for 2022?
Amy Norton (she/they) is a sex writer, blogger, and pleasure product afficionado who has been running her site, Coffee & Kink, since 2016. She is a polyamorous, queer femme and lives in the UK with her nesting partner, cat, and frankly ridiculous collection of vibrators.