Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and, if you’re anything like me, you might be looking for ways to celebrate that go beyond the traditional “flowers and chocolates”. Whether you’re staying in or going out, Valentine’s Day is a great opportunity to make some time to focus on your relationship(s) and bring a little extra sexy energy into your life.
Here are a few of our ideas to get you started.
What could be a sexier Valentine’s Day date night than a visit to a sex club? Check out your local swing venue or BDSM dungeon for a very X-rated night out. While many clubs cater primarily to couples, some will also allow you to attend by yourself if you’re single. Single men are usually only welcome on specific nights, so check the rules before you leave.
If you don’t want to play or hook up with new people, it’s completely fine to just have sex with your own partner… or even just to watch and enjoy the atmosphere. You should play to your comfort level and not feel pressured. No reputable venue will expect you to do anything you don’t want to.
Sex toys are a classic way to celebrate Valentine’s Day.. Why not surprise your partner with a new vibrator, stroker, or something a little more unusual? Pro tip: the Hearts Grind Ring makes a super sweet and sexy gift.
If you’re single, don’t forget that Valentine’s Day can be a great excuse to buy yourself a present. After all, your first and longest sexual relationship is with yourself!
Have you and your partner always wanted to try shibari, wax play, or erotic massage? Or perhaps you’re single but fancy upping your masturbation game, learning to lap dance, or improving your oral sex skills. If so, Valentine’s Day is a great time to check out a class. You might find events at your local swing club, BDSM dungeon, or feminist sex shop. You’ll also find listings on Fetlife.
If online learning is more your style, educators all over the world are still running sessions via Zoom.
If you’ve never paid for your porn before, now is the time to start. Paying for your porn helps to ensure that the content you consume is ethically produced and that the people making it are paid fairly for their labour.
Treat your partner or yourself to a subscription to an adult streaming service, or purchase a few clips directly from your favourite performer. You’ll enjoy higher quality content, support creators so they can make more of the stuff you love, and you might just discover a new fave!
Do you fancy yourself as a sexy secretary, a naughty nurse, or a student who needs a spanking? Get a little adventurous in the bedroom this Valentine’s Day with some erotic roleplay. You can buy costumes and props if you want to, but all you really need is your imagination and plenty of trust.
If taking on a completely different character doesn’t appeal, why not try playing slightly different versions of yourselves? One roleplay favourite is to pretend you’re strangers again, meeting for the first time.
If you’re into BDSM and one of you is usually the Dominant, try switching roles if you’re both up for that. At best, you might discover a whole new way to play. Even if you decide you don’t want to switch regularly, you might have a laugh and learn something new about each other.
If you and your partner do penetrative sex, you can also try swapping which of you is the giver and which is the receiver. If the person who is usually receptive doesn’t have a penis, a good strap-on harness and a silicone dildo will help you create a hot experience together.
Remote control sex toys like the Lovense Lush and We-Vibe Chorus were designed with long distance play in mind. If you live apart from your partner, they’re a great way to enjoy a sexual connection no matter where in the world you are. But even if you’re physically together, handing over the controls for your sex toy to your partner can be a hot and intimate experience.
If you’re feeling extra daring, try inserting a wearable vibrator before you go out to dinner and slip the remote into your partner’s hand (or tell them to download the app onto their phone).
We’d love to know what you’re doing for the Day of Love this year. Tell us in the comments how are plan to celebrate valentine’s day!
Amy Norton (she/they) is a sex writer, blogger, and pleasure product afficionado who has been running her site, Coffee & Kink, since 2016. She is a polyamorous, queer femme and lives in the UK with her nesting partner, cat, and frankly ridiculous collection of vibrators.
