Eric tried to gather as much seasonal good cheer as possible for the coming spectacle. The very staid affair of suits, ties, church services, and dealing with his father-in-law. Things he had to do to keep the peace, but made the holiday difficult to tolerate.
It would be hours of listening to a lecture on doing better in his corporate job and getting a bigger house. It would culminate in talk of children. Eric plucked at his collar, feeling the weight of the coming day settling on his chest.
“Are you almost ready, Olivia?”
He walked into the room and was stopped in his tracks. His wife was face down in the bed, ass in the air, wearing nothing except a white bra. She spread her legs when he entered, showing him her fingers as she played in her cunt and the white bunny tail plug nestled between her cheeks. Her favorite dildo, a multi colored cock that glittered in the light, lay wet on the bed near her lips. Fucking hell.
Her voice was a breathy whimper that made his cock harden painfully.
He approached the bed and trailed his fingers along the curve of her butt. She shivered under his touch, arching so he could see more of her fingers thrusting. Eric grasped the tail, pulling and pushing so the bulb teased the flesh of her anus and made her moan deep in her chest.
“We’ll be late for service.”
Even as he said that, he was unbuttoning his dress pants to free his cock. His eyes shifted from her cunt, her labia fat and wrapping around her fingers as she thrusted, and her mouth glossed to a high sheen. Eric could bump her plug as he fucked her, adding a teasing sensation to his own pleasure. But her mouth…
It was nothing to grip her coiffed hair and guide her mouth to the head of his cock. He pulled her forward as he pushed deep into her throat. A hard slap to her ass caught the tail and elicited the most erotic moan that reverberated up his cock. He grit his teeth as his balls tightened. A shudder breath and he was back under control.
He took up a steady rhythm then. His hand landing in a loud clap that made her tail jump and his cock thrusting into the warmth of her mouth. All the while, her fingers worked to find her climax. Just the fact that they were going to turn up to Easter service late, her cunt soaked and her belly full of his come, had him riding the edge after only a few moments.
“You’d better come quickly or I’ll be sending you to mass with that tail on under your dress.” He yanked until her eyes were on his. “Then I’ll tease it all through dinner until you beg me to fuck you in the bathroom while your family devours hot cross buns.”
That sent her into an orgasm so intense, he had to keep hold of her head so his cock stayed buried in the heat of her throat. Her plug bounced with the buck of her hips, the fluff waving in air. The way she groaned around him, a low hum that seemed to move through his whole body, sent him plunging over the edge. He was forced to lock his knees to keep his trembling legs from failing him.
Olivia released his softening cock with a sigh, her eyes glazed and her lips glossy with spit and come.
“Guess I’ll get dressed before dad wonders where we are.”
He grabbed her wrist, halting her movements, and brought her wet fingers to his mouth. The taste of her on his tongue was better than any Easter chocolate he’d taste today.
“Leave the plug.” Eric patted her bottom as he stepped away. “I’ll want to play with my little bunny later.”
Suddenly, the prospect of spending Easter with his father-in-law didn’t seem so bad.
She watched me twirl the panties around my finger. As I approached the bed where she lay splayed open, her eyes skipped from the flash of the panties as they spun and the bounce of my naked breasts.
“Open those legs wider for me, little girl.”
Obedient little thing. The way she moved the moment I spoke made my cunt hum.
She bent those long legs up and then spread them so the lips of her pussy parted. Wetness dampened the hair that decorated her mons and around her vulva. The fact that she didn’t wax or shave, that the musky scent of her intensified, turned me on so much I wanted to lick her from clit to asshole. Later, I’d taste her and the thick cream she’d produced just for me. After I’ve fucked her.
I stepped into the panties, sliding them nice and slow up my thighs to settle them on my hips. They’re comfortable against my skin, the crotchless back let cool air tease my cunt as I bent over her. The band is thick and lays flat against my tummy. I considered grabbing a vibe to put in the secret pocket near the front, but disregarded that idea. I didn’t need any help coming.
Her eyes are on the panties now. I fingered the O-ring, enjoying the way her brown nipples tightened to harder points. She reached up to tease those trembling peaks just I reached the bed. I batted away her hands and slapped one breast.
“Did I tell you that you could touch yourself, little girl?”
“No, Miss.” Her long lashes swept low to hide her eyes, but she opened them quickly.
I stepped up on the bed, prowling over her body so I can lay a kiss on her lips. Her mouth is soft and tasted of the moscato I’d given her earlier. I deepened the kiss, tasting all that sweetness with my tongue until she started panting.
The dildo I picked is a vibrant pink color, opposite to the almost understated nature of the panties. I pull it from bedside table drawer and tap her lips with it.
Those full lips parted and I slipped the dildo into her mouth. She started sucking, her eyes holding mine as she took it deeper. Her tongue swirled around the head as I pulled it out. I pushed it back in, loving the way she gagged on it. She never once took her eyes off of me even as tears blurred her vision.
I’d never thought about having a penis, but the way her lips sealed around the fake cock had me thinking of her wet mouth in a different way.
The dildo slid into the O-ring with ease. Unable to stop myself, I moved up to straddle her chest. She knew exactly what I wanted, opening her mouth again so I can push into her throat one more time.
“Get it good an wet for me.”
Such a good girl. Her eager mouth and tongue worked the dildo again. She released it with a pop that made my clit throb and gave me the look of a woman who knows exactly what she’s doing to me.
I grab the lube off the bedside table and move me down between her spread legs. If it’s possible, she’s wetter than she was before. Her thighs tremble as I run my nails from hip to knee. Her clit pokes out from between and I tap it. The way her hips thrust up seeking my hand makes me chuckle. She gave a little whine.
“Tell me what you want? Use your words.”
Her breath hissed from her as I dipped one finger in her hot cunt.
“Please fuck me.”
I drizzled lube on her clit and her hips thrust up again. Grabbing the base of my cock close to the panties, I tease her with the head. She whimpers and tries to push so the head slips in.
“Uh uh. Beg me, little girl. Beg me for my cock.”
It was my cock. The way I held it, teased her with it, and the way it laid against my body so close. This was mine to wield and use on my girl.
She bit down on her lower lip and squeezed her eyes shut.
“Please, Miss, I need you. I need your cock inside me.”
The quiver in her voice pulled me in. I tapped the head on her clit, slid it down, and then pushed inside. Even though I couldn’t feel it, not her wet heat or the squeeze of her body, the way she gasped and trembled beneath me had me close to coming in an instance.
It took a few thrusts to figure out the rhythm, the movement foreign. Once I caught the tempo of it, I found myself gripping her hips and fucking her with rolling thrusts.
“Oh god.” Her whimpers turned into full blown cries of pleasure as I pulled her into me.
Her hands gripped my wrists, her short nails digging into my skin. She moved with me effortlessly.
I glanced down, watching as the pink dildo, my cock, entered and exited her cunt. She’d covered it in her juices, the surface glistened in the light.
“Oh. God.” Her words were desperate, snapping back to her face contoured in pleasure. “I’m going to come.”
“Come on my cock, little girl, do it.”
She gave a harsh cry and arched her back. I knew her cunt was squeezing for all it was worth. Her breasts bounced in the most enticing way. I leaned forward, careful to keep my thrusts steady, and latched on to one of those tempting nipples. Every bit of her tasted sweet.
When she relaxed, I slowed to a stop, leaving the dildo seated inside her. I kissed her lips, loving the dreamy look on her face.
“May I fuck you with the strap on next, Miss?”
Her cheeky smile was back and my cunt gave a spasm of agreement. Such a naughty little girl.
This piece was inspired by this beautiful image of Monkia wearing a RodeoH harness which was taken to celebrate the launch of us selling Rodeoh products.
Yes it is that time of year again and everyone is searching for that perfect Christmas gift. Now here at Godemiche we obviously have plenty of options for you to peruse but we also like to be helpful to our costumers and so we have put together this little list of alternative ideas that grabbed our attention this year.
If wet and messy play is your thing then you are going to love Slube. You can use it in the bathtub, you just rinse it away with water afterwards or you could keep until the warmer months and use it in a paddling pool. At the moment this product is part of The Kinksters Black Friday sale and so is a super bargain at just £4.99. Surely worth taking a gamble on and slipping (pun intended) into someones Christmas stocking
This vibrator was only launched a couple of months ago and it looks like no other vibrator we have ever seen before. It uses the innovative PulsePlate Technology™ that was famous in their Pulse range of toys and adapts it for clitoral stimulation and right now they have a sale on and so you can grab one at a bargain price.
Now this one is not strictly a Christmas present, but Christmas cards and these are not your run of the mill Robins in the snow or nativity scenes. These cards are funny, silly, naughty, and rude and ideal if you are looking something very non traditional to send this year.
Yes I know we said other ideas but we thought we would put this on the list as after lots of requests from you we have added different sizes to the Hercules so as well as the original large it now comes in both medium and small which we think will mean there is a size to suit everyone’s taste.
How about something completely different and sign up your beloved for Girl on the Net’s amazing audio porn project on Patron. There are different levels depending on your budget but for $5 a month the recipient would get exclusive access to her audio recordings. If you pledge more money though you get additional benefits!
Outlandish Creations make all sorts of mugs, plates, and tea cups. At first glance they look like something you would find in a posh china shop or your Grandmothers best china cupboard but when you read the words on them you realise they are not quite so innocent. We love this Bollocks mug but if you bollocks are not your thing then don’t be off because there is all sorts of naughty ones to pick from.
Socks are surely a Christmas stocking staple but these are not just your ordinary run of the mill socks these are boob socks. I mean come on now, how brilliant is that?
Lingerie for Christmas? I know it sounds a bit cheesy but seriously the stuff from Playful Promises is so divine that I really don’t think you can go wrong. Picking a favourite was almost impossible but in the end this decadent wine red velvet just screamed Christmas sexy to me and if you are going to get this then make sure you team it with the perfectly delicious matching knickers.
Whilst this might look innocent enough surely those with a vivid and filthy imagination like myself can see the potential in this super cool gift. I can just see it hanging on a bedroom wall saying Fuck, or Lust or Come or, well that is up to you, but you can see what I mean though.
This is not for the faint-hearted or for the new or inexperienced to impact play because even though I have never felt this monster on my bottom I can tell you that the name The Holy Hell is exactly what I think if when I look at it. That things is going to hurt like hell but I also think it is going to leave amazing marks and so if that is your thing then this unique spanking strap would make a fabulous gift for the Dom type in your life.
Seriously check out this guys work. It is amazing and wouldn’t it make for a wonderfully unique and thoughtful gift to give to someone? A commissioned portrait. I know what you are thinking, that must be insanely expensive but according to his website they are just £35.
Is any Christmas stocking complete without some chocolate? Instead of the usual selection boxes or After Eights why not go for something completely different but perfectly seasonal.
Christmas can be a stressful time of year especially when it comes to finding the perfect gifts for the people you love so hopefully these twelve gift ideas will go some way to helping you with that conundrum.
Strapon sex and pegging doesn’t have to the same old bend over boyfriend. Because of where the prostate sits in relation to the anus, different positions can give him a whole new experience. Likewise, incorporating sex toys into your strapon sex can be just whats needed to spice things up.
Also for an apprehensive partner, bending over can bring up intimidating images of ‘jail house bend over and take it’ scenarios. In this case using different positions is often the key to helping your lover open up to the pleasures that anal sex can hold for him.
Also, like typical PIV sex, different positions during strap-on sex provide different sensations and opportunities to take your strap-on sex to new levels of enjoyment.
Missionary is one of the easiest positions for strap-on sex. In this position, she can sit or kneel comfortably in-between his legs and not having to worry about keeping balance. Also, it’s easy to see his anus and guide the phallus in without having to awkwardly fumble around. With him on his back, there’s full access to his penis and balls and he has full access to her breasts. With a bit of imagination, this position can be incorporated in a variety of ways. Such as, a pillow can be positioned to lift his bottom up for easier access or he can even be on the edge of the bed with her standing-between his legs.
Cowboy is a fun position that allows him to be in the driver’s seat. With the female partner laying on her back and him straddling her body, he’s in full control of the angle, depth, and pace of penetration. This is ideal for those women who are a bit nervous about taking control. It can also be adapted to reverse cowboy to give him a different sensation.
Like a missionary, he’s fully exposed for extra stimulation and with eye to eye there’s connection and ease of communication between you both.
The lap dance is another great position that allows him to be in full control of the fun. With the woman sitting in a chair, he straddles her lap either facing her or turned around backwards. In this position, she can easily reach his penis for extra stimulation.
Tailgate is a good position for those who enjoy rear entry. With him lying face down and her lying on top of him, this position allows you have skin to skin contact. She’s in complete control of the penetration and can feel extra stimulation herself by grinding her clit against the dildo’s base.
Spooning is another fun position for the skin to skin contact. However, unlike Tailgate, in this position, his penis is exposed for extra stimulation. Spooning works well for couples of different body sizes and heights. When enjoying strap on sex in this position, penetration is shallow and a longer dildo might be needed to reach the P-spot.
Doggie style is probably the most common position used for strap on sex. Perfect for ladies who are new to pegging, this position allows her to easily penetrate and maneuver. It allows her to clearly see his anus, find her center of gravity and get used to the rhythm of thrusting. Also, it’s easy for him to stimulate his penis in this position. Doggie style is also great for those who desire to explore dom/sub role-playing, his bottom is up and ready to be spanked while you play.
In any position where his manhood is exposed, a sex toy can be add. Toys such as a Fleshlight can give him a whole new experience. Not only is he able to feel stimulation both anally and on his penis, it’s a fun way to fulfill a threesome fantasy without actually bringing in another partner. The Fleshlight can be held by either partner or in-between cushions to hold it in place.
Another fun toy to use during strap on sex is a wand; preferably cordless. With a wand massager placed on the dildo, the vibrations can be felt throughout the dildo to stimulate his prostrate and her vulva at the same time. A wand massager can also be held against his perineum or the penis’ head for more intense sensations. Although wands are fun to use in this fashion, any vibrator can be used.
You can take your strap on play to a whole new level by exploring dom/sub roles. Positions such as Doggie Style gives full access to his turned up bottom for a spanking. Using paddles, floggers or even a short crop can be just what your new sub needs to be a good boy.
These by no means are the only ways to enjoy pegging, virtually any position will work well. Use your imagination and be creative. Because of where the prostate is in relation to the anus, each position will feel different for him and open up new possibilities for extra stimulation.
There’s no right or wrong way to play. No matter what position you choose, remember, have fun and explore.
This blog post was written by Lori originally for ThatPosition (not existing website).
Most of us have heard stories that tell of mind blowing orgasms from anal sex. However, for many, the first time trying anal sex is also the last. When considering the discomfort and sometimes sharp pains running through your bum when trying anal for the first time, it’s easy to understand why most people have only tried anal sex once. But, take it from me, your first time doesn’t have to be your last. With three simple golden rules, you can forget the ‘ouches or yikes’ and become an anal sex rock star.
#1 Go Slow – I know that it’s hard to slow down, especially when taboo territory is fixing to be explored. But, take it from a pro, going slow and taking your time is key to ensuring that both you and your partner have a positive experience.
#2 Warm Up – Warming up the area before you play relaxes tight muscles for what’s to come, making insertion easier.
#3 Lots of Lube – Slippery when wet. Lube helps with the initial insertion and keeps everything slippery making it more fun for both of you.
You wouldn’t believe the number of times that I’ve heard, “nothing goes in my butt, that’s for experts only, or that’s painful”. How can you argue with that? All of these statements are valid feelings. All too often, someone who’s an anal virgin finally warms up to the idea, only to find that it’s painful. Usually, this can be attributed to an overzealous partner who is also inexperienced and tries to force their way in past muscles that aren’t ready to open up.
The physiology is rather simple. The anal opening is controlled by the sphincter muscles which is designed to stay nice and tight. Unlike the vagina, these muscles take a bit of coaxing to open up and be ready for penetration. Going too fast and trying to force them open will only result in it being painful. But not to fear, there are lots of ways to warm up the area.
Just like foreplay helps set the mood, your ass needs a bit or attention before jumping in. A sensual booty massage, oral sex, anal rimming or even intercourse works well. Anal safe sex toys also work wonders. Such as, rubbing a vibrator over the perineum area and around the anal rim or using a butt plug. Butt plugs are especially helpful because they hold open the anal sphincter muscle allowing it to relax and acclimate to being open. I find them really helpful because I can insert a plug before our playtime and when the time is right everything is relaxed and ready. No one size fits all, butt plugs can be purchased in various sizes and shapes, which allows you to choose the style that will work well for you.
Going slow is critical to ensuring that anal sex is enjoyable for the receiver. For most, the first few moments after insertion is a make or break time. This is when people typically say it hurts and give up. If you are the giver do NOT jump in and start pounding away. Instead, take time to savor the moment and have patience. I know it’s hard to hold back, but believe me, your lover will appreciate that you let them take the lead. But just because they are taking the lead and going slow, doesn’t mean that you have to be bored. Kissing your lover and stimulating there other reachable erogenous zones goes a long way to keeping the passion up and helping your lover relax at the same time.
The last of our golden rules is lots of lube. This may seem a bit weird, especially if you’re not used to using lube. But believe me, lube and anal sex are best buds. Unlike the vagina, the rectum doesn’t lubricate itself. Instead, it’s lined with a mucous membrane. Although this works great to help move waste along the intestines, it doesn’t do much to help with the friction of sex. That’s where lube becomes your new best friend. It coats the rectum and provides a slick surface making anal sex much more comfortable. Lube is not just for comfort, using lube also helps to maintain your rectum’s health. Without lube, the thin mucous membrane is susceptible to tearing which increases your chances of contracting Hepatics C. Lube also helps to maintain the longevity of your rectum. Over time, having anal sex without lube can lead to what some refer to as a “worn out hole”. In a nut shell, constant friction and pulling of the sphincter muscle from anal sex without lube can cause the muscle to lose its elasticity making it unable to close tightly.
How much lubricant should you use? When having anal sex, you can never have too much lube. In my bedroom, when preparing for anal sex, we make sure to lube both the giver and the receiver. We apply lube before insertion and, many times, he’ll pull right back out and apply more lube. We always keep the lube close at hand in case more is needed while we play. Something I’ve noticed during both anal and strapon sex is that the bottom side of his member or my dildo tends to lack sufficient lube causing a bit of discomfort when penetrating. To make sure things are slippery and comfortable, we tend to go extra slow at first taking our time to apply more lube. It maybe be a bit messy, but it’s well worth a little mess.
Not one of my anal sex golden rules, but often a concern of those who are new to anal pleasures is the possibility of a mess. This fear is completely understandable, no one wants to discover an accident in the middle of their fun. Not to worry, with a bit of preparation, accidents are unlikely. Such as, having a normal bowel movement and using an anal douche to rinse the bits out of your rectum. Typically this is enough to ensure that things are nice and clean prior to anal sex. In all honesty, after a few years of enjoying anal sex on a regular basis, we’ve only had an accident a few times. Although it can be embracing, it’s not something to freak out over. For us, we keep a box of baby wipes nearby in case a quick cleanup is needed. Although it happens rarely, Hubby is always very kind about the situation and will help me relax before he excuses himself to wash off. Although the receiver is often freaked out to find that they’ve caused a mess, the giver typically realizes that it was unintentional and not the end of the world. However, if you are worried about the possibility, wearing a condom during anal sex makes for quick and easy clean up when needed.
When the topic of anal sex is brought up, it’s not something to cringe at. Following these golden rules will help ensure that it’s a positive experience for you both. Share them with your partner and use the rules to help open up a healthy discussion about anal sex. Equipped with knowledge before you jump in. I’m sure you’ll find that anal sex can be an extremely gratifying sexual experience.
This blog post was originally written by Lori and published on ThatPosition.
Unfortunately, Lori doesn’t write anymore, so we can’t link it to her website.
The picture was taken by Lori.
The release of ‘Bend Over Boyfriend’ by Dr. Carol Queen and the gang at Good Vibrations in 1998, seems to have sparked a strap-on phenomenon between heterosexual couples. With sales of strap-ons leading the way in the sex toy market, it’s clear that strap-on sex is quietly being embraced by our society. But where does the love of strapping on a dildo come from? Is it a newly discovered sexual pleasure?
1. Throughout the ages, there are signs and clues left behind of dildos being used to worship fertility gods, in rituals, for sex and were even used as baby mobiles in ancient Greece. Did anyone ever think to strap on one of these dildos? As with most of the humanity’s sexual history, the advent of strap-on sex is hidden within a few precious artifacts, ancient mythology, writing, and even paintings.
2. The oldest known relic that’s believed to be a strap-on is from the Upper Paleolithic Period; c10,000 bc. Among the many artifacts that appear to be dildos, a double ‘baton’ has been discovered with a hole in the middle. Archeologists theorize that this hole is for a strap to hold it to the wearer. There’s also a Japanese wooden strap-on dildo that’s been discovered.
3. Archeologists have also found an oriental double ended dildo carved from jade that date back to the 10th – 13th century. Being made from Jade, it’s clear that this was once a prized procession of the owner.
4. Ancient Egyptian mythology also gives a glimpse of strap-on pleasure with their belief that the ebb and flow of the Nile River was caused by Atum’s (the god of creation) ejaculations. This sparked the ritualistic ejaculation of Pharaoh into the Nile River. The strength of the rain was thought to correlate to the strength of the pharaoh’s ejaculation. It’s believed that to ensure an abundance of rain, the pharaoh’s wife would massage his prostate with a phallus while he sat on her lap and masturbated.
5. Clues of strap-on use are also found in murals decorating the walls of long forgotten brothels and bathhouses. In the Suburban Baths at Pompeii Italy, a mural has been unearthed which depicts a threesome with male anal penetration. Another mural at Pompeii that’s especially exciting, shows a woman penetrating another woman as well as males with a strap-on according to Roman Scholar John Clarke. These murals seem to prove that sexual exploration, as well as strap-on sex, was embraced and celebrated in ancient Italy. It’s no wonder the bathhouse was such a popular place.
6. Another ancient painting, from Athens and the Corinth Archaeological Museum, portrays a female figure dancing while wearing a strap-on dildo and a tail, before a seated Dionysus.
It’s believed that most ancient Greeks and Romans regarded women who took upon themselves the role of penetrating as having oversized clitorises to please their lover with. Roman mythology is also full of gender bending tales. Such as Hermaphroditus the son of Hermes (Roman Mercury) and Aphrodite (Venus) which is described as being both male and female. Also, Macrobius describes a masculine form of “Venus” (Aphrodite) who has a beard and male genitals but wore women’s clothing. Belief in this mythology survived through Greek and Roman cultures as seen is sculptures of Aphroditos, a female figure who pulls up her woman’s clothing to reveal male gentiles.
Not only through artifacts and art, strap-on sex is also found in many ancient writings. Such as in the poetry of Herodas, the 3rd century bc Greek poet. Found on recycled papyrus that was used to wrap mummies. One of Herodas’ poems describes women going to a cobbler for dildos that were carefully stitched from scarlet leather and are described as being very soft, ‘like the real thing’. He makes mention of straps but doesn’t expand on their purpose.
In the writings of Seneca the Elder’s Controversiae, a Roman writer, refers to lesbians as Tribades who use strap-on dildos. Likewise, Seneca the Younger, a Roman philosopher makes mention in Epistle Morales ad Lucilium of women penetrating men. Strap-on sex is also talked about in the Secret History of Prociopius; where Theodra, wife of the Emperor Justinian, is depicted as penetrating the ‘hinder parts’ of her male lovers.
7. Hibreas, a Roman Orator, is thought to have once said of Tribades, ‘I first examined the male to know if it was natural or stitched on’. Likewise, Marcus Valerius Martialis, a Latin poet, portrays Flinene Pedica as a Tribute who sodomizes the boys more heated than a husband and ‘fucks eleven girls or Boys in a single day’.
Also, in Affairs of the Heart by a Latin satirist, a direct reference to strap-on dildos is made.
“Therefore, if even men like you, Callicratidas, can find satisfaction in women, let us males fence ourselves off from each other; but, if males find intercourse with males acceptable, henceforth let women love each other too. Come now, the epoch of the future, legislator of strange pleasures, devise fresh paths for male lusts, but bestow the same privilege upon women, and let them have intercourse with each other just as men do. Let them strap to themselves cunningly contrived instruments of lechery, those mysterious monstrosities devoid of seed, and let woman lie with a woman as does a man. Let wanton tribadism — that word seldom heard, which I feel ashamed to even to utter — freely parade itself, and let our women’s chambers emulate Philaenis, disgracing themselves with Sapphic amours.
And how much better that a woman should invade the provinces of male wantonness than that the nobility of the male sex should become effeminate and the male play the part of a woman, as a woman can strap to themself these instruments and do a male as a male!”
If that isn’t enough to paint a picture of what strap-on sex might have looked like in ancient times, we find even more examples. Such as in the writings of Hipponax, a 5th-century Greek poet who describes a female using a strap-on on a Greek male. Also, a vivid tale of strap-on sex is found on papyrus which was recycled to wrap a mummy and was recovered at Oxrhynchus in Egypt.
In Lydian tone, she said, “Come hither, I will plug up your tight asshole.” And she beat my egg sack with a sprig of lilac as if I were a satyr. I fell backward, breathing heavy…”
8. A very similar passage occurs in the Satyricon of Petronius, which describes the sexual pleasures of the Emperor Nero Oenothea brought out a leathern dildo which, when she had smeared with oil, ground pepper, and pounded nettle seed, she commenced to force, little by little, up my anus. The merciless old Virago then anointed the insides of my thighs with the same decoction; finally mixing nasturtium juice with the elixir of southern wood, she gave my penis a bath and, picking up a bunch of green nettles, she commenced to strike me gently all over my penis and belly below the navel. This tale of female dominance is found within the ancient writing of Inanna and Ebih. Not only is it a story of the goddess dominating Elbih, but there are also descriptions of elaborate cross dressing transformation rituals.
9. It’s also found that strap-ons were seen in ancient Greek Theater where male only casts would wear gigantic phallus attached to their waists in satyr-plays.
No matter how obscure the history of strap-on sex, one thing remains clear; strapping on a dildo isn’t anything new. It’s been enjoyed by both female and male lovers alike throughout the ages. From the brothels of Pompeii to the hidden sex chambers of Rome, sexual exploration has historically been embraced and celebrated. Given the popularity of ancient dildos and the acceptance of male anal pleasure, it isn’t a far leap to conclude that strap-ons have played a role in sexual enjoyment throughout all history.
As part of our new series of posts inspired by our recent mistakes on social media we have been reaching out writers in the adult blogging community to get them to write some content for us that shows our commitment to both our own learning but also sharing useful, relevant and informative content with you our customer. This piece about female genital and sexual anatomy was written for us by Kayla Lords. We felt this was an important subject area for us to cover in this series and we are delighted with Kayla’s work
Think back to health classes in school, you know, the days when the reproductive organs were discussed. Even if you didn’t receive anything that looked or sounded like good sex education, at some point, in health or in science, anatomy was discussed. For most people, the only thing you learned about the female anatomy was the names of reproductive organs that no one can even see.
The problem with the way most of us have been educated about anatomy and sex is that the female genitals have been largely ignored. We all know what a penis is and where the testicles are, but most people have no idea what the vulva is or that the area where urine is released is different than the area for penetrative sex. Hint: it’s two separate openings.
With that in mind, to make everyone has a better understanding of the female genital and sexual anatomy, here’s a quick lesson that we all should have received many years ago.
The mons pubis, sometimes called the Mons Veneris, is the fleshy mound below the lowest part of the stomach and above the vulva. This is the part of the genitals covered in pubic hair. The purpose of the mons pubis is to cushion the pubic bone during sex.
The vulva is what most people (incorrectly) refer to as the “vagina.” This one word encapsulates the entire outer female genital area. This includes the labia, clitoris, vaginal opening, and urethral opening. When you want to refer to yourself or your partner’s genitals, call it the vulva, not vagina.
There are two parts to the labia, sometimes called the “lips” of the vulva: the outer labia (labia majora) and the inner labia (labia minora). Every set of labia will look different from person to person. Some people have large fleshy outer labia that are clearly visible. Others have small labia and that part of the vulva looks tucked in. Labia are different colors and sizes, and they change as people age.
The clitoris proves that looks can be deceiving. From the outside, you may or may not see it at the top of the vulva. It looks like a small and unassuming button and is covered by a clitoral hood. Like the labia and every other part of female genitalia, it can be bigger or smaller from person to person. But that little tip (or button) is quite literally just the tip.
The clitoris extends into the body a few inches and looks a little bit like a wishbone. This part of the body exists solely for pleasure and is filled with thousands of nerve receptors. The only area that can be easily touched is the small tip at the top of the vulva, but for many people, that’s enough. Clitoral stimulation is one of the more common ways people with a vulva orgasm, and for many of us, it’s an intense release.
The urethral opening is located just below the clitoris and above the vaginal opening. Urine comes out of the body from this location. The Skene’s glands are located on each side of the opening. Also referred to as the female prostate glands, the Skene’s glands release female ejaculation from the body.
There are two parts to the vagina. The part you can see and where penises, sex toys, fingers, and tongues are inserted is the vaginal opening, located right below the urethral opening. The rest of the vagina is actually a long tube on the inside of the body. While objects may enter the vagina, this is also where babies and menstrual blood leave the body.
Bartholin’s glands are located at the vaginal opening. This is what lubricates the vagina during arousal making penetration easier. The vagina is stretchy and elastic to accommodate penetrative intercourse and childbirth. While many people worry that a vagina can become too “loose,” the reality is that most vaginas contract back to their usual size after sex and childbirth.
Tip: A “tight” vagina is often an un-aroused vagina so don’t necessarily feel too proud if your partner is tighter than usual. Make sure they’re into the moment and properly aroused.
The uterus, sometimes called the “womb,” isn’t just for growing fetuses, although that is it’s main job. This small, pear-shaped organ is the reason the vagina grows longer during arousal. It lifts toward the belly button in a move known as “tenting.” This is meant to aid penetration.
The cervix is located between the vagina and uterus, separating them. It stretches and dilates to allow menstrual blood out and sperm in. Think of it as the connector between the vagina and the uterus. You can actually touch it with a finger, penis, or dildo which, in some people, can cause discomfort. Pounding sex is only exciting when the person being pounded likes the feeling. In some people those hard thrusts hit their cervix and cause pain.
The G spot was discovered by Dr. Grafenberg, for whom it’s named, and is a spot located inside the vagina. Some experts believe that the spot is actually the junction between the urethra, clitoris, and vagina, which makes it super sensitive for some people. When aroused and stimulated, the G spot can produce pleasurable sensations and even orgasms in some people.
To look for it, insert a finger or two into your vagina and hook your fingers so that you touch the anterior wall (the side closest to your stomach). Now make a “come here” motion. If you feel a spot that’s ridgy or different from the surrounding area, that’s likely your g-spot. If it it feels good, keep stimulating the area.
If any of these body parts are news to you, you’re not alone. Many people with vulvas don’t necessarily understand all the parts of their own anatomy. The benefit of understanding how the vulva works isn’t just so we’re all better educated. Knowing your own body, or that of your partner’s, can help make sex and intimacy more fun and pleasurable for everyone.
As loyal Godemiche followers may know, there was a recent social media incident where Adam expressed a less-than-favourable opinion of pubic hair, and many body-positive folks understandably took this as a major offense. While Adam and Monika issued a sincere apology, they also saw the opportunity to take a mistake and turn it into a learning experience to educate both themselves and others about body positivity. It’s a word we hear regularly around these parts, but it’s not something anyone’s often looking to define; for that reason, I was thrilled to be a part of this project both as a blogger, and as a fan of Godemiche.
In preparation to write this post, I read a lot of articles on the definition of body positivity, trying to put into words exactly what it means to love yourself and in what ways this is often practiced. But you know what? None of those articles satisfied me; everyone wanted to be specific, defining body positivity as something as simple as size acceptance or fat acceptance. These are both crucial pillars of which body positivity stands upon, but I’d like to think that in this day and age, body positivity comes down to one simple thing: your body.
To worry about whether you’re too fat or too thin to be loved by society, yourself, or those around you, is a parasite that seems to live in your brain forever. But what if those aren’t your issues, or at least, not your only issues? What if you hate your patchy skin, your thick leg hair, your big teeth, or that obvious scar on your arm? What if your genitals don’t live up to how society thinks they should look, or even more, what if your genitals don’t match up with the person you are at all? Where is the body positivity for these folks?
It’s for everyone. Loving your body is for every person experiencing self-doubt around their physical experience, and this doesn’t just mean size. Our bodies have a lot going on, and society has a lot of ingrained behavior that likes to tell us what is right and wrong – but that in itself is wrong. The only person who can decide you look good, is you.
I don’t think I could find a straight definition of what body positivity is, because it is really so many things.
What body positivity is:
- To recognize that no body is perfect, and that we are all worthy of love no matter our perceived flaws
- To celebrate these flaws and learn to love them as a part of ourselves
- To accept ourselves and others just as we are, and to see the beauty in all bodies
- To not give in to society’s standards, just because you feel it’s the thing you should do
- To express yourself through your body – whether it be tattoos, body hair, or wearing whatever you want – because it makes you feel damn good
What body positivity isn’t:
Glorification of Obesity
I’ve encountered some people who seem to think that fat acceptance is celebrating an unhealthy lifestyle and encouraging others to join – like a cult. (In fairness, telling me to eat pizza is probably the quickest way to get me to join a cult) But this is an image that needs to be broken; for one reason, because it’s not true. It’s just not. But the other reason is because if you buy into this, then you’re fat-shaming those who are a part of the body-positive movement by bringing faux “concern for your health” into the picture. Many think the health platform is an acceptable way to practice fat-shaming, but it’s not; it’s simply a more self-righteous way. You don’t truly care about our health; you just don’t like how what we look like doesn’t line up with what you think is acceptable.
A Way to Guilt Others
It should go without saying that a movement involving positivity of any kind should have no association with guilt, but it needs to be said. For instance, the diet and fitness community has a way of making us doubt ourselves in the form of before/after photos. How many transformations have you seen where the author states how much he or she hated themselves, how ugly they were, and how they NEEDED to lose weight? How many times have they proclaimed “never again” or “going to the gym is the only kind of body positivity”? There is no right and wrong kind of body positivity – if it makes you feel good and it’s a step towards being content with who you are as a physical person, then it’s not wrong. Just because one person found their body-positive journey one way, doesn’t mean that’s the way for you.
A Marketing Tactic
With the mainstreaming of the body-positive movement, it unfortunately brings about companies using it as a buzzword to sell everything from jeans to diet plans, touting how becoming your “better self” is what body positivity is all about. While nurturing your body in a physical sense is, of course, an act of self-love, claiming that these capitalist ways are the path to body love is false; body positivity is in the mind.
Now that we’ve established that, let’s visit just a few of the physical aspects that body positivity can include, depending on who you are.
As a pillar of the body-positive movement, learning to accept the size of ourselves and others has been a long road. When I’m not plagued with doubt while staring myself in the mirror and grabbing at my tum, I’m hearing other people remark on how “she’s too big to be wearing that” or “maybe she should eat a sandwich”. How on earth are we supposed to feel good when we’re surrounded by a constant negative dialogue stating how we SHOULD feel?
Accepting our size is the first step towards loving ourselves; if you’re already very happy with your weight, then congrats! You’ve crossed the first and most common hurdle into body positivity! But if not, simply look around and find beauty in all those around you; I often find myself looking at a woman on the subway and thinking “Wow she’s gorgeous. And she’s bigger than I am.” These moments call attention to the fact that our size is not the defining factor in our appearance, and it is definitely not the deciding factor in our self worth.
Pretty much all humans have body hair, and yet all genders face a stigma over this natural state (some more than others). Women are shaving themselves to resemble an Olympic swimmer from head to toe, while men hear all about brozilans and why they MUST wax their back hair. There’s no way to win… except to embrace what you love.
I for one prefer to keep smooth underarms and a trimmed vulva, and I even like the routine of shaving my legs in the tub; not everyone does, and that’s alright! Your body hair is no one else’s businesses, and while others can freely express a personal preference, they have no right to take away your comfort. Shaving is hard work, and for some, shaving the pubic area can be downright painful; discuss with your partners about what makes you both comfortable, while both acknowledging that what you do have is perfectly natural. There should never be any shame in owning your bush (no matter where it is).
Many people will argue that something as simple as skin doesn’t have a place within the body-positive community, but how is that possible? It is literally the casing for our entire body. Even before size, skin is the part of us that others see first, and it’s not always ideal. Ranging from those who hate their freckles or struggle with psoriasis, to the extremes of skin disorders like vitiligo, which is the loss of skin-darkening melanin in places all over the body. These days, freckles are celebrated rather than concealed, and even models with vitiligo are making a splash, but it’s not always so easy. Seeing yourself represented in the media is always fantastic, but this rarely changes the gnawing self-doubt, and body-positivity is there to help with the self-criticism that we all know so well.
This is an issue that stems well beyond body positivity, but it deserves a place within this community. Trans or non-binary folks may feel like they were born in the wrong body, with genitals and gender-biased features that don’t match up with their gender identity. If you think it’s hard to look in the mirror and see a flaw that you don’t feel belongs, then imagine that applying to the rest of your body. It’s a tough journey, and the brave people who reject the judgment and embrace their natural beauty deserve their body positivity moments as well.
For many, it comes in the form of mantras like, “I am strong” and “my body loves me” to remind them every day that there is nothing wrong with their body just as it is. Of course for others, transitioning is the most body-positive act for their life. In fact, this is one thing that some people in the body positive community wont tell you or even admit themselves: sometimes body positivity means changing something about yourself. There’s no shame in tweaking something to better fit what you feel is inside you, whether that’s something as minor as a new tattoo, or as major as sex reassignment surgery.
There is never a wrong way to love yourself.
As the founder of Godemiche, Adam, joked and mimed motions of ‘disgust’ at the thought of female pubic hair, his partner could be heard offering a reasoned defence for the natural growth that most people experience and which some elect to keep.
Adam’s sentiment was not well-received.
Since then Godemiche have offered a very heartfelt apology and have reached out to leaders in the adult blogging community to engage in an educational process involving various articles on the topic of pubic hair.
I am very honoured to be part of this initiative.
The Problem With Pubic Hair
Sadly, the initial attitude that Adam held towards pubic hair is not an uncommon one, and neither is it seen in a negative light by many. In a recent survey by Cosmopolitan it was reported that 46% of their male respondents preferred their women to be completely bare in the pubic region. Comparatively only 6% preferred the natural look.
This is especially interesting when contrasted against the female perspective—with only 12% of women liking their men bare, 70% preferring it trimmed, and a similarly slim 10% liking the natural look.
Perhaps equally worrying is that the main reason stated for grooming one’s pubic hair was the sense that it would make them more sexually attractive.
Let’s set the record straight right away—pubic hair is not a bad thing. It protects our body from bacteria and other unwanted nasties, it provides a buffer from friction, it regulates temperature, and (as an interested tidbit) it is thought to trap pheromones and similar scents that increase our sexual attractiveness to our partner.
These traits are highly beneficial and yet the current consensus is that pubic hair is unhygienic and somehow hinders sexual attraction.
What is going on!?
If there’s nothing wrong with pubic hair physically then there’s only one answer: The problem with pubic hair isn’t the hair itself, it’s our attitude.
Shame or Shave
Unsurprisingly, the history of shaving one’s pubic hair in modern society (especially if you’re a woman) is rooted in the fashion industry.
As early as 1915 companies were encouraging women to keep parts of their body trimmed to compensate for the increasingly revealing design of clothing. By 1922 it was considered an extreme embarrassment for women to allow unshaven parts of her body to be shown.
As fashion continued to get closer and closer to the pubic hairline so, too, did the mounting pressure to make sure that not a single stray hair was exposed.
The ultimate transition to being completely bare has often been associated with pornography, where it was a trend in the 1980s.
From a filmography perspective, the origins of this weren’t intended to shame women but were still catering to a male gaze. With porn being prevalently aimed towards men, shaving a woman’s pubic hair allowed them to see more of the vulva, as penetration occurred.
The perhaps unintended outcome of this was that a gradual expectation grew that women should be shaved and that a shaved vulva was more sexually appealing.
Tie this in with the fashion industry’s desire to profit off women’s insecurity, and the link between showing more skin and less hair and, gradually, a self-regulating attitude of shame and sexual aversion grew around women’s pubic hair.
Of course, these issues affect men and trans or genderfluid individuals, but the mentality has stemmed from an attitude that prevalently criticises women’s bodies. It’s hugely unlikely that a man will be asked to shave his pubic hair in case his partner ‘chokes on a hair’, or something similar, it is much more likely that a woman will be asked this.
It is one of many ways in which the criticism of women’s bodies (followed by an expectation that she will change to cater to the person’s needs) is condoned in our society, and the fact that the presence of a woman’s natural hair is now the subject of jokes and ridicule is indicative of just how used to this internal oppression we have become.
But What Can Be Done?
As with Godemiche, the first move in countering such attitudes is to realize that they’re a problem to start with.
This isn’t always as easy as it sounds. As a species, humans have a predisposed bias towards following the group consensus, even when presented with facts that may say otherwise. This means that to strike out against a common attitude is, itself, inherently difficult.
Once you’ve recognised the possible issues when it comes to problematic or misogynistic attitudes (in any instance) the next step is research.
In the case of pubic hair we have already explored the origins of a preference to keeping trim, but what are the benefits of removing one’s pubic hair?
In this instance, the consensus is none.
The removal of pubic hair can cause abrasions, soreness, or even infections—with up to 60% guaranteed to experience such abrasions. Ingrown hairs increase with shaving and STIs become more of a risk. The process of shaving or waxing is also rather painful, and can even be traumatic for some individuals.
All-in-all expecting a person to shave their vulva is essentially like expecting them to routinely hurt themselves for your aesthetic preferences.
Is this acceptable?
I think most of us would agree that it’s not.
But what if the individual in question shaves for themselves? What if a person feels more confident with a shaven bush and has self-esteem issues that are directly associated with the visibility of their pubic hair?
In such instances, it’s important to make sure that your partner is shaving out of a sense of confidence and empowerment rather than just a fear of rejection or being deemed unattractive. Perhaps they do not know the damage that shaving can cause—at least 59% of women shave because they believe it is for their own health—but do make sure that you approach the issue in a respectful way, rather than trying to explain the factors to them as if they may not know them.
Communication is crucial in any challenging of pubic conventions and taking a self-reflective and reasoned approach to such discussions (whether with a partner, an uninformed individual, or anyone else) is vital.
If the shaven individual you speak to knows all of this and is still perfectly happy with their grooming choices them awesome. It’s their body and their choices and as long as they’re informed and acting from their own agency then anything beyond that is none of your beeswax.
Equally, if someone chooses not to shave and it goes against your preference then this is something you must learn to respect. You may discuss your preference with them but, ultimately, you should recognise it as such—a preference, and not necessarily one that has the best of cultural origins. If this is a deal-breaker then so be it, but it’s important to recognise that such a situation would not be the fault of your partner, who is not obligated to change to suit your needs.
Lastly, if you really wish to cater the negative attitude that exists against people’s pubic choices (natural, shaved, or otherwise) the most important thing is to be fiercely vocal and make sure that you challenge derogatory attitudes towards people’s grooming choices when you see them.
Godemiche have seen the benefits of such activism and now they are trying to be part of it with this educational series. It is my hope (and theirs) that you read this piece and use it to (continue to) be an ambassador for pubic hair and personal grooming choices everywhere.
Here’s to the vulva in all its many states! Let no blame or shame meet its acquaintance.
Image courtesy of Wikimedia
Female ejaculation and squirting have been subjects of interest for centuries, and yet these natural yonic occurrences still carry an unnecessary taboo. As we find ourselves in 2017, female ejaculation is still not widely accepted as a normal sexual response.
Very little scientific research has been undertaken, and in the studies that have been performed only a few women were included as test subjects. The aim of most of these studies has been to pass-off the fluid ejaculated as urine, and incorrectly dismiss the experience as invalid or as ‘sexual incontinence.’
Porn is generally the only exposure we have of squirting in the media, albeit a totally inaccurate portrayal, as it’s frequently misrepresented or faked. Few women are able to squirt on command, or produce the sheer volume of fluid porn actresses appear to be able to have mastered.
Despite the mystery surrounding female ejaculation and squirting, many women experience either or both, at some time in their lives. For some women, like me, squirting is a regular feature of their sex lives and it occurs spontaneously without trying to achieve it.
You may already be a lady ejaculator (or “squirter”) without even realising, as the fluid expelled can be part of the mix of male ejaculate and sexual excretions, or it may not be a significant enough amount to notice.
Female Ejaculation vs Squirting
Female ejaculation and squirting are said to be two different types of phenomena, although both result from female sexual pleasure and can occur separately, or at the same time. Both female ejaculation and squirting usually happen around the time of climax, however they may happen any time during sexual play.
Female ejaculate is whitish in colour and originates from two paraurethral glands, known as the Skene Glands, which are located at the bottom of the urethra. These glands are also known as the ‘female prostate’ as they produce a semen like fluid (minus the sperm!)
Alternatively, the liquid involved in squirting or ‘gushing’ expels from the urethra, and is clearer in colour or slightly opaque, like watered down milk. The volume of lady juice emitted when a woman squirts is commonly larger than its ejaculatory counterpart. Although it’s expelled from the urethra, it is not foul smelling or yellow like urine.
What Does It Feel like for a Woman to Ejaculate?
Spoiler: Despite the shroud of mystery and unicorn enigma that surrounds female ejaculation, the type of orgasm experienced when it occurs may not feel much different to the orgasms you are already experiencing. Unless a fair amount of ejaculate is produced, you may not even notice that it’s happened.
Squirting or gushing on the other hand, can be quite impactful. Not only does it produce a seemingly large amount of liquid, the orgasm that follows around the same time can be more powerful than the climaxing without expelling any liquid. My gushing orgasms take hold of my entire body, and leave me with an enormous sense of relief. If I’m wound up or tense prior to having sex, squirting alleviates any tension or anxiety I was previously feeling in a more dramatic way than a sexual session minus the fluid.
A sometimes-inconvenient side effect of being a squirter, is the need to protect the surface I’m having sex on before coitus. The amount of juice I emit is enough to soak the bed sheets, despite it being said that women generally don’t squirt more than an ounce of fluid during an ejaculatory episode.
Unlike non-ejaculatory orgasms*, squirting leaves me feeling highly charged emotionally, and will often cause me to cry despite feeling the opposite of sad or unhappy. I find squirting an incredibly intimate experience, which makes me feel especially connected to my lover. More so, than if I orgasm without it occurring. Perhaps this aspect is psychological, as there is physical evidence of my sexual pleasure sprayed across our bodies and the fabric underneath us.
Factors Involved in Achieving Female Ejaculation
Almost all women have the same genital anatomy, and should therefore technically be able to squirt, although it might not be that straight forward. It could be viewed as a bit of a sexual jigsaw puzzle, as there are generally a number of components involved.
If squirting is a sexual experience you hope to achieve, then it’s essential to get in touch with your G spot. The G Spot is usually located approximately 1.5-3 inches into the vagina, however the exact location differs for all women. For some women, it can be felt as a ridge or slight difference in the texture of the tissue, and others rely on the change in sensation to work out if it has been hit or not. When a woman is aroused the G spot swells, and you might feel the need to urinate.
In order to squirt, your G spot needs to be stimulated. I find the two positions I’m more likely to squirt in are the missionary position, or when I’m being penetrated from behind doggy style. For some women, a vibrator or dildo may be more effective than penis or fingers in locating and arousing the G spot. In particular, a dildo or vibrator with a curved shape or one that is hard as the G spot responds to strong pressure and can take more pressure than the rest of the vagina.
Practice is essential in developing a stronger connection with your sexual self. My strongest piece of advice for any woman wishing to achieve female ejaculation is to masturbate, both solo and with the aid of sex toys to develop a better understanding of themselves and the types of sensations they find pleasurable. By giving yourself regular solo lovin’, it may also enable you to feel more relaxed when having sexual intercourse with your partner, and lead to more satisfying sexual experiences.
Not only is squirting a biological response, it is also a psychological one. A relaxed mental state is a vital component in being able to achieve female ejaculation. Despite squirting being my regular sexual reaction, it has rarely ever happened during a one night stand or with a lover I haven’t felt relaxed or had a strong connection with.
Am I Missing out If I Haven’t Experienced Female Ejaculation?
Due to the hype surrounding female ejaculation and squirting, it may be easy to feel as though you are missing out on something radical or earth-shattering it you haven’t yet been able to achieve an expulsion of fluid during your sexy times. It’s also completely reasonable to want to try all the flavours of the sexual rainbow, and incorporate new and exciting experiences into your life.
However, it is not the be-all and end-all of sexual pleasure. Even if it never becomes a component of your sexual ability, or your body’s sexual response, it doesn’t mean your sex life lacks fulfilment.
If female ejaculation or squirting are not experiences you are unable to achieve at this stage, put your FOMO aside. Focus on experimenting, and continuing to discover pleasurable sexual experiences with yourself and your partner. Who knows, one day it may happen without you even trying.
*Women can cry after orgasm regardless of whether they squirt or not, but in my case it consistently occurs solely post squirting orgasm.